Chutzpah’s Weekly Barometer

by Katie on March 16, 2012

A light hearted look back over the past week’s good, bad and indifferent including the “don’t even go there’s”.

LOVING
John Galliano for Schiaparelli – Let’s face it. It’s THE DREAM. Denied by just about everyone involved but let’s hope there’s no smoke without fire.

Coach’s ‘Willis’ bag – We love it’s updated look and its style that  takes inspiration from archive designs, updated with rounded edges, hand-burnished vachetta and colour-blocked leathers. From £240-£275. V classy indeedy.

’Fifty Shades of Grey’ – Softcore phenomenon and New York Times bestseller, the trilogy has been snapped up by a British publisher for a rumoured six-figure sum, with a first print edition due in April.

MonicaandJoe.co.uk – Our favourite online boutique celebrates their first birthday. Two of the nicest people in the business to boot.

Marks & Spencer’s Savile Row Inspired collection – Richard James, the dapper don of London’s Savile Row, has collaborated on this new range of men’s suiting, shirts, and accessories, using British woven fabrics. The collection will consist of 27 pieces including suits, shirts and ties and will be available to buy on the website and at 20 stores. Suits will be priced from £299 to £599, shirts at £49.50 and ties for £29.50. 

MA1 jackets – The military bomber jacket has been made over for Autumn. Team Chutzpah has his eye on Katie’s vintage Junior Gaultier version.

‘Designing Women’ at the Fashion and Textile Museum – Exhibition charting the pioneering post-war textile designs of Lucienne Day, Jacqueline Groag, and Marian Mahler. Until 16th June 2012.

Agyness Deyn x Dr Martens – Sometimes a partnership makes such absolute sense you have to wonder why they didn’t think of it before? Supermodel Deyn teams up with the cult footwear company for a limited edition line of clothing and shoes. Says Aggy,  “The brand is a great fit for me, as it stands for strong character and being able to shape your own personal identity.”

‘Game Change’ – Forget Meryl, Tom Ford muse Julianne Moore gives us scary Sarah Palin realness in this HBO political drama based on the 2008 US presidential election. We’ll be watching from behind a cushion.

ModelCo’s One Night Tan – Dipping our newly waxed legs into Spring and showing them for the first time is daunting as ever. Help yourself by giving them a glow with this velvety mousse that gives a natural bronze and washes off when you say so. No long term streaks either! £24 for 150g can.

HATING 

Katie Price’s musical career – She’s in a recording studio. She’s working with Dane Bowers. Be afraid. Be VERY afraid.

St.Patrick’s Day – Once a cultural and religious holiday, the 17th of March now signifies an excuse for hopped-up carnage on the country’s high streets. Poor Ireland. Re-claim it back bros & sisters.
The Frugalistas – TV’s ‘New Girl’ Zooey Deschanel does it, but could you live a ‘Less Is More’ life?  This maximalist couldn’t. Then again, we’re already over her. She’s gone from being quite sweet to ultra irritating in just 4 episodes. 

Wicker handbags – Sprayed gold and lined with leopard print, yet still unbearably naff.

Yellow trousers – For cartoon bears and Eurotrash only. Men- if you must do it, if you really must, then we advise that you avoid the more eye-watering shades and go for Adolfo Dominquez’s dusty old gold pair.

The Amy Childs tanning range – Because we obviously all want to be the same shade of teak as an Essex girl. Surprisingly not in collaboration with Cuprinol, the former TOWIE star’s tanning products hit your local Tesco this week. Classy.

Piers Morgan – Kate Moss gave him a good kicking, and rightly so. Still no word when the former Mirror Editor will be asked by the Leveson enquiry to defend recent accusations that he had previously lied to them.

‘Surprise Surprise’ (ITV) – Mawkish Sunday night Cilla Black vehicle revived with that nice Holly Willoughby girl (who looks about 15 years older than she is), we can only hope she doesn’t feel the urge to sing the theme tune like Cilla did.

The Smooth Groove – Billed as an antidote to the dreaded Camel Toe. This is not an excuse to wear tighter trousers, or for Fergie from Black Eyed Peas.

Red meat – So now we can’t munch on a Byron Burger any more? Takes years off your life, apparently. Rather like listening to a Black Eyed Peas record. 

Prosseco – Anticipating a long hard Summer of events, it’s not our trampagne of coice. Please re-term Pissecco *spits*

Fashion retail ethics – Or, rather, the lack of them. We were scandalised by this blog from the wonderful Vanessa Friedman, detailing the depths which emerging designers need to stoop in order for their collections to reach the buying public. We say NAME and SHAME now. We are suspecting it’s one of those fancy Parisian boutiques. 

DON’T CARE
The Louis Vuitton train – Sorry guys. But this had enough bells and whistles (and previously done by Galliano, natch) to distract from the Edwardian garb, not that you’d hear anything of the sort from editors desperate for the Vuitton advertising dollar. Rumoured to cost US$8m, and still not running on time, did we miss the press release about LVMH buying Network Rail?

‘Mary’s Bottom Line’ (Channel 4) – Not content with salvaging our high streets, Mary Portas now swings into action to save Britain’s manufacturing industry and unemployed workforce –  if you believe the posters and trailers. Pseudo knicker waving jingoism timed for a London Olympics and Diamond Jubilee year. Buying right into ShamCam’s spin. Next up for Mary: Cleaning the Augean stables and fetching the golden apples of the Hesperides. We suspect a future Hons List in the offing.

This week’s Barometer compiled by Lee Clatworthy (@TeamChutzpah) and Katie Chutzpah. Please let us know your thoughts.

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